Birthdaywishesformy Boss

A Legend of the FIAT 600.

Posted by Chicha. Excellent! Some

morning, coming down the Panamericana from Zárate to Buenos Aires and

as expected, poor FIAT 600 was broken.

Then I pulled to the shoulder waiting for someone to spend 10 minutes and a Mercedes Benz Kompressor appeared at 170 km / h passing in front of me. In this I see the type of Mercedes reverses and returns to the Fitito. Right there

offered to tow my poor crap, and I accepted immediately, but please ask him not to run much, if not my Fiat and I were going to end up in hell (of course). And

combinations that would make lights every time the Mercedes was going faster than recommended.

Then the Mercedes began to tow, and subject to sail with the speed, it was light (I put it in the singular, because for a change, one of them was short and did not work).

In that, you see a Porsche Carrera GT, black, polarized fachero evil, intimidating the Merecdes. This does not allow it jacket and goes: 120, 130, 150, 190, 210, 240, 260 km / h.

I was already desperate, with crazy lights, and both the re pair and farts ..... ... There, we passed a Highway Patrol station, but neither saw the radar, which registered impressive 270 km / h.

Then the police advised by radio to the next post:

- Warning! Attention!

Two men, one in a Mercedes Silver Gray and another in a Black Porsche disputing a dive more than 270 km / h on the freeway,

y. .. boys ... I swear by my mom, my children and my laburo:

Behind them, sucked the Mercedes, a Fiat 600 is making lights to let it pass!

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The Cuckoo Clock ... Humor

Again Chicha with his jokes,

for me is fantastic.

Enjoy!

Last night I went out with my girlfriends a "meeting."

I told my husband to come home at 12 o'clock. "I promise," he said.

But the "meeting" was very good, glasses, little dance, more drinks ... and it was time for me. It

I got home at 3 am completely drunk.

had just entered and was fucking cuckoo clock 'cu-cu' three times!.

When I realized that my husband was going to be awakened by the sound,

shouted "cuckoo" other 9 times ...

I was so proud and pleased to have been suddenly

even drunk, such a good idea to avoid a fight with my husband.

I lay down as smooth and ready thinking how smart I am.

the morning, at breakfast, my husband asked me what time he arrived

and replied that he had arrived at 12 o'clock, as he had promised.

said nothing and seemed suspicious.

"What biennnnn! Saved!" "I thought.

Then he said:

"By the way ... We have to change our cuckoo clock.

longer in doubt, I asked," yeahhhh? And why, my love? ".

And I said," Well, last night was watch 'cu-cu' three times ...

Then, somehow, he shouted: "Shit !!"...

Then he 'cu-cu' four times more ...

vomited in the hallway ... He 'cu-cu' other three times ...

We started laughing, and again was 'cuckoo' ...

He ran, stepped on the cat, broke the table in the corner of the room,

lay by my side giving the final 'cuckoo', he threw a fart and fell asleep. "

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Murphy's Law ... Source: Ramo García.

A who does not happen?

1. MURPHY LAW - If anything can go wrong will go wrong.
MURPHISMO
2. FIFTH PRINCIPLE - Not only will go wrong, but do so in the worst of times.
3. THIRD ROUND OF BUSINESS THEORY - When a company launches a series of new models to market, the most neglected is the darling of the consumer.
4. ENTROPY THEORY OF McPHERSON - It takes less energy to remove an object from its place to relocate. RIDDLE
5. COMPUTER CARTER - The backup file will not contain the information you just never lose.
6. MURPHISMO FIRST PRINCIPLE - There are always more chances of things going wrong that go well. Maah
7. ACT - Things go well for you then can go wrong. OSBORN
8. LAW - Variables not change but the constant itself. ACT
9. BROOK - Adding manpower to a late software project will only further delayed.
10. FANT LAW - When you try to open a locked door with the only free hand, the key is always in the opposite pocket. OBSERVATION
11. OWEN - The plastic bag will never assume the side that first. FOURTH
12. MORAL OF MURPHY - You suspect that there are four possibilities for a procedure goes wrong and managed to avoid a fifth possibility arose without hesitation. SECOND PRINCIPLE
13. MURPHISMO - An error becomes useless the entire set of data. ACT
14. ENTOMOLOGY CYBERNETICS OF Lubarsky - There is always another virus.
15. BERRA'S SECOND LAW - Anyone who is famous tends to be loathed. SILVERMAN
16. PARADOX - If Murphy's Law can go wrong will go wrong.
17. KAREN LAW OF STUB FOR WOMEN - Whatever you're looking for, you're probably in the other bag. MURPHY
18. CLARIFYING THE LAW OF THOMAS WOLFE - You may have wanted to go home, but then you always stay apetecerá.
19. LAW LIE - No matter how many times it has been shown that a lie is false, there will be a percentage of people willing to believe it.
20. FIRST LAW OF TIMING - If more than two clocks in a house there are never two that mark the same hour. SIXTH
21. MORAL OF MURPHY - Always prepare yourself for something, something will emerge that should be done before.
22. ROSTER OBSERVATION - Two heads are better than one if both are stupid.
23. FIRST PEAK CORPORATION - When choosing between consistency and accuracy, always choose the consistency.
24. O'BRIEN LAW OF THINK TANK - The worse the idea, the higher the rank of the person proposed.

Saiyuki 53 Yaoi Doushinji

will excuse this absence?

To illustrate this point I leave this video speaks for itself. Thanks for your patience. Ynometoques.

My Legs Ache - Sitting Down

thought you would not??

And I could tell you many things that have happened in recent times but I will not be too selfish, much less to bore you with my stories. The important thing is that I meet beautiful people. Silvina here my fellow Pink Floyd fan unconditional, hence he commented that my love for Waters announced comes from the time when cinema halls were filled with smoke Lavalle and young people who still did not understand that he played "another brick in the wall "in their lives. Sure, it was that time when chewed fresh (some), that liberation from the yoke ... that "the end" (as Manolo) we have not succeeded. Today but I can not ... but I promise to update this page .. you more than myself ... Here I leave you with something special ... long overdue walk through our heads .. but for music lovers I leave In The Court of Crimson King

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SEJUELA - The disease that became PANDEMIC!

We warmly welcome our new partner "chicha" has entered the field of medicine itself , alerting us to this cruel disease .... the sejuela. Good luck in this area and please do not stop their occurrences and reflections approach ... Chicha thank you very much!!

ynometoques

Submitted by Chicha

LIST OF SYMPTOMS THAT DEFINE THE APPEARANCE OF THIS PANDEMIC:

• coffee
  If you lose sleep.
• If a beer takes you directly to the bathroom.
• If everything seems very expensive.
• If you alter any nonsense.
• If you get dizzy to get into a bank to change a lightbulb.
• If you have more hair in nose and ears in the head.
• If all you small excess causes weight gain.
• If you reach the age of metals, (hair silver, gold teeth, pacemakers, titanium, and for men's testicles oxidized lead and member).
• If you love almost three times a week (mostly on Monday, almost on Wednesday, almost on Saturday).
• If a cut of meat you fall very heavy, spicy irritates you butt and you repeat garlic.
• salt
  If your blood pressure skyrocket.
• If you ask the waiter to a table as far as possible from the music and people.
• If tying your shoes give you back pain.
• TV
  If you numb.
• If you use multiple types of glasses (for distance, near, medium, sun ...).
• If not tolerate the loud music and think it's for crazy people.
• If they say "ma'am" or "lord" everywhere.
• If you get cold by opening the refrigerator. All these symptoms are irrefutable proof that you suffer "SEJUELA." THU SE Youth

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Who does the dishes??

Posted by rusolokura

A guy is walking around the field with his new bike when he sees you to rain, so decide to seek shelter and heads to a house. It opens a very nice man who invites him to dinner. When the rider enters the house, you see that is full of dirty dishes everywhere, and the house explains:

- Yeah, see, is that long ago decided that would wash the dishes that person to speak at dinner, and of course, we're all willing to do anything to not have to scrub all these mountains. Incidentally, this also includes you ...

Total, which are put out to dinner and the cyclist, who is impressed by the amount of garbage that are everywhere, someone decides to talk, and then it's up to a tit the eldest daughter. As no one says anything, he proceeds to lift her skirts and the brush there, but everybody remains silent, so then goes to the other daughter and gives also ahead of the rest of the family. But no one dares open his mouth, so that the rider, more determined than ever, the Krajina to the mother, and again no sound. The rider does not know what to do, and hear thunder, then remember that the bike and have to cover from the rain, so grab a paper, write a note saying "It Vaseline?" and gives it to her husband, who immediately gets up and says:

- Okay, I fregare the damn dishes!

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The Sweet Taste of a Woman Exquisite, Gabriel García Márquez

Submitted by Zilvuchi

A exquisite woman is not one that most men have their feet, but one that has only one that really makes you happy. A beautiful woman is not the younger, or thinner, or that has the skin smooth and hair more most striking, is one that with just a smile and good advice can be happy life. a valuable woman is not one that has more titles, no more academic positions, is one who sacrifices his dream to make others happy. An exquisite woman is not the most ardent, but which vibrates to make love only with the man she loves. An interesting woman is not one that is flattered by being admired for their beauty and elegance, is one strong woman of character to say NO. AND MAN ... DELICIOUS MAN is one that values \u200b\u200ba woman.

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Do not you dare leave the workplace!

Posted by rusolokura

Three workers clean windows on top of a skyscraper. One of them is an urgent need to go to the bathroom and decides to get off his saddle. While in the bathroom, a very strong wind hits the building and vacuum precipitates his two companions, who crash into the pavement ... That night, our friend, who has no consolation for what happened, he goes with his wife to wake from their peers and try to give encouragement to widows ... but can not find enough words of encouragement. Suddenly burst into the hall two gentlemen very circumspect, asking for the widows and address them:

- Ladies: According to the policy laid down by the insurance company ... this is a check for 1,500 000 .- euros for each one of you. Have checks and receive our deepest condolences.

our friend's wife looks stunned the scene and turns to her husband and says,

- Sure! And the señoritoooooo ...? Cagando!

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Argentina - Short Course: How to call the police to a possible theft.

Posted by rusolokura

I have a very light sleep, and last night I noticed someone walking quietly through the garden of my house. I got up and stood silently along the slight noises coming from outside, until you see a silhouette through the bathroom window. As my house is very secure, with bars on the windows and internal crossbars at the gates, I did not worry too much, but it was clear he was not going to let the thief there, watching quietly. I called the police, informed the situation and gave my address. I asked if the robber was armed, that was the weapon caliber, if he was alone, if it was inside the house, etc.

no and I explained the characteristics of the weapon he knew nothing. I was told that there was no patrol car to help, but that they would send someone when possible. That if anything happened to call back ...!!!! Two minutes later I called again and said with calm voice:

- Hello, I called a while ago because there was someone in my garden. No need to hurry. I already killed the guy with a 12 gauge shotgun, which I have saved for these situations. And the shot hit him in the face! .. He flew his head and now his brains are scattered around the garden ...

After three minutes, was in my lane 5 federal police patrol, a police helicopter, the ombudsman, the attorney on duty, 2 patrols of Civil Defense, a team of TV reporters, photographers , 1 Member, 2 councilors and a human rights group, which was certainly not miss this for anything. The police caught the thief red-handed, who was watching everything with a face of wonder, perhaps thinking that mine was the house of the Chief of Police .....

Amid the tumult, an officer approached me and said:

I thought you said it had killed the thief.

I said,

I thought I had been told that there was no one available to send.

¡¡¡¡¡ Viva ARGENTINA, Carajo!!

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Policy: To keep in mind. Humor

Posted by rusolokura

In certain sectors of society supports a successful entrepreneur in the confidence with him, the country will go forward, because if it is successful in business also will be in politics. Let's see how successful entrepreneurs are played politically in the past.

MARTÍNEZ DE HOZ

indebted to ARGENTINA DURING THE MILITARY DICTATORSHIP IN MILLIONS OF DOLLARS 45,000 Federico Pinedo

FATHER OF PRESIDENT'S BLOCK (PRO) of Mauricio Macri FACTS

was Minister of Finance of the Nation during the infamous decade of Augustine P. Fair and Ramon S. Castillo. As finance minister during the government of Justo was questioned by Lisandro de la Torre. He held the same portfolio with President José María Guido when he was removed Frondizi. During his performance Pinedo ordered a drastic devaluation of the peso and resigned a few days later on suspicion of having advanced the measure to family and friends who allegedly benefited from it. Azaretto, Roberto: Federico Pinedo political and economic - Foreword by Dr. Domingo Cavallo. The author was chairman of the Democratic Party. Federico Pinedo (1895-1971) Pinedo-face of criticism from his fellow Conservative Party for having met with the ex-president Marcelo T. de Alvear resigned as minister-president Ramon S. Castillo. Mauricio Macri "DEFEND THE INTERESTS OF THE CITY OR ITS BUSINESS AS EMPLOYERS who preceded him? 1) Who was president when it was discovered SEVEL evading taxes in 1993? Correct Answer: Mauricio 2) Who was convicted in 2001 for smuggling car parts that? Correct Answer: Mauritius 3) Who came up with the teacher tax (the famous teacher wafer), was responsible for its distribution and stayed with 10% of all proceeds? Correct Answer: Mauricio 4) Who was vice president of the company that owns the Argentine post months before it went bankrupt and was discovered million dollar debt to the state (and subsequently should be re-nationalized)? Correct Answer: Mauritius 5) Who built the boxes at La Bombonera without competitive bidding and making it through one of its companies? Correct Answer: Mauricio 6) Who has a liability of 75 million pesos in Boca and to invent non-existent income to dispose of the balance sheet deficit? Correct Answer: Mauricio 7) Who does not meet the requirements of the City Charter regarding INCOMPATIBILITIES to be head of government? sisi, you guessed right ... Correct Answer: Mauricio

HERE SOME OF THE MORE DEVELOPED SOME CASES: Sevel: According to the DGI, Macri company evaded the 55 million pesos from 93 to 95 during President Mauricio Macri in the company. Sevel in Argentina in 1993 exported auto parts to Sevel Uruguay, which allowed him to collect refunds on exports. But, in turn, those parts were assembled there and then imported to Argentina in the form of finished automobiles. Thus, charged Sevel export rebates and performing imports with a tariff differential of 2 percent. Thus, we benefited from the import system offset from the exported vehicles. After comparing numbers of chassis and motor vehicles of 1300, it was determined that the same parts that came from Argentina to turn were re-entered the country after being bought and sold and Drago Sevel Uruguay SA, allegedly controlled by Sevel. An estimate made by the researchers concluded that the amount of proceeds received as reimbursement only in 1993 is about 7,000,000 pesos. It is estimated that these exports continued until 1995. The judges acquitted the Macri: Oh, all that Mauritius was arrested by 4.9 million dollars but later the court Menem (Moline, Vazquez, Nazareno ...) with the famous 'automatic majority' acquitted of Macri rejecting the appeal of the case despite having no grounds to do so. Faced with accusations of corruption and his dubious performance these judges were impeached and resigned or were dismissed (case Moline) in 2003. The dubious performance in the case Sevel was one of the charges against them. Macri Group (GCOS), which Mauritius was vice president until 2003, with Banco Galicia as a minority partner, won the 1997 privatization of postal service in one of the last transactions consummated the Menem. This did: At the time the award was achieved for 30 years with the promise to pay the State a semester fee of 51.6 million pesos / dollars. However, in 1999 left to pay it. If there is a signed contract to be fulfilled. Correo Argentino SA had entered into competition preventive September 2001, when he owed $ 900 million. Macri Group's debt to the State is 659 million dollars (at 1 to 1), today some of 1,977,100,000 pesos (3 to 1 according to the present) and without taking into account the interest. Employees fired en masse (10,000) were compensated. But then the Macri group claimed that these severance pay computed as corporate assets. "Investment in what? In his farewell, Macri not give numbers, the last balance sheet of 2006 shows a liability of 75 million. Moreover, the deficit does not balance due to be joined are non-existent income. This is curious if we return Macri's words in 2004 (before the sale of Tevez for 18 million dollars) to 'Boca Juniors had covered its budget for the next three years. " Recall that after that Gago was sold for 22 million dollars and other players like Insua, Bilos, Abbondanzieri, Alvarez, Rusculleda, etc. In 2006. For Insua was a $ 5 million also in 2006, although he did not want to be transferred. Did You Know ... that does not meet the requirements of the City Charter regarding incompatibilities and that the role of head of government is incompatible with: ownership, management, manager, sponsor or perform any other advisory leadership role or mandate of company that contracts with the City. There are several companies that contract with Macri City, such as: INTRON SA (control of the fine photographic), SIDECO AMERICANA (parking), SEPSA (easy payment, etc.).

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High Flight! Ooooooooooolee

For rusolokura

In a commercial flight, the commander connect the microphone and starts talking to passengers: Good morning gentlemen

passengers, at this exact moment we are eters 9,000 flying high and the city of ...

- OOOHHH; mioo GOD!

Passengers heard an awful scream, followed by a terrible noise:

- NNNOOOOOO!

"Splitctct, splocfff, flackkk uuuuuuuooooooommmm !!!!!!!!!"

And then a silence that is eternal ...! Seconds later, the commander returns to take the microphone and laughing, apologizes:

sorry, gentlemen passengers, I threw my tray, and my coffee cup fell on me. Do not want to know how was the front of my pants ...

And one of the passengers yells

- Son of a bitch ... Vos

should see how it turned back from mine ... **********************************************

******************

a flight takes off from Argentina to Europe. The ship's captain welcomes the passengers, informing them about the flight and the weather and finally wishing you a very nice farewell tour. Unfortunately forget to close the microphone and makes a comment to this passenger:

"Bueeeeeeennooooo ... now I smoke a fag and then taking advantage of first class travel no no, I'm going to get laid with the stewardess, the kind that leave you dead, you saw ...?"

desperate

The stewardess, seeing that all the passengers were listening to what the captain said, he throws the race to signal that the microphone was open, but on the way you come to meet an old woman who says

"Whither, horny ...? did not hear first going to smoke a cigarette?"

********************************************* *******************

P-r-e-t-e-e-n N-u-d-e-s

!

No Comments ... but good reflexes type eh?? Youtube for

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Uh! That was the way out ... I spent! Mafalda and Garfield

If you do not see the output .... here this driver shows you how to return .... watch it! Youtube by ynometoques

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A park has been said!

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The key is the difference ... no?

Posted by rusolokura

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What will it take ... and talent!

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Treading the earth with bare feet ... to reflect

collaborated send this ppt: rusolokura

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Fairy Godmothers ... are women!

Posted by rusolokura